Bonding Brothers

Bill had to go to Dallas on Friday and decided to stay up there for the weekend to hang out with Uncle John. He took Roy with him so that left me with Gavin and Kiernan. I will warn you that this is a post of picture overload. First I thought Gavin's hair needed some trimming. I always think barber shops are so expensive but I sometimes get nervous that I am going to mess up the boys hair. I try to cut it every other time but I was just feeling confident that I can do it and I am not spending another dime on haircuts. I CAN DO THIS!! I even cut Bill's hair so there really should be no costs for hair cuts. Here is my little guy getting ready.And here he is the next morning...... Not to bad. He is of course holding his brother. They were playing on the floor while I got us all ready to head down to Devine with my family to check out the land and see my grandma.When we got to the land my mom wanted to throw out grass seeds. She had all the kids following her around spreading seeds. Me, Gavin and KK! Look how pretty the landscape was. We were down not even two weeks ago and everything was dead. We have added a little rain and WOW what a difference.I, of course, wanted to get the boys together.

Gavin just couldn't get Kiernan to cooperate. Kiernan loved sitting and playing in the flowers. He always uses his middle finger. Cracks me up!

Cutie Pie!!!

I sat KK next to his cousins, Hadleigh. They had so much fun together.

Me and my boy in the wind.

Not only are these boys the cutest little boys in the whole world but look at that background!! I cannot wait for the bluebonnets to start growing. I will be dressing up the boys and taking them back out there for pictures for sure!!

My mom found some deer bones. Gavin and his cousin Rocco thought it was so interesting. My mom is explain the food chain. They didn't understand why the coyotes wanted to eat the deer.

When we got back, I put Kiernan in the swing in my mom's backyard. Gavin started pushing him. I love this picture because this captured exactly how Kiernan looks at Gavin. He adores him. Gavin is such a great big brother and so sweet to him. I just loved watching their little relationship grow this weekend.

It was such a great weekend with the boys. I had a lot of fun with my family. I love going out to the land. It was such a beautiful day. Back to reality...... Spring Break is coming. We get the older boys back on Wednesday and we will have them through the entire Spring Break until school is back in session on Monday!! WOW.... guess I better start thinking of some things to entertain them for the whole week. Can't wait!!!!

Step Parent Part 2

I feel like after reading other step mom stories that I am not alone. I never actually thought I was all alone but it is so hard to explain situations to friends or family or even your husband because they just can't fully understand what I am feeling. Hearing other's stories has allowed me to see I am not crazy and that other people in my exact situations feel the exact same way I do at times.
As I sit back and think about the last five years of my life, they have been extremely hard but somehow we are still floating and pushing through together. When I first came around I could see the brokenness in each person's heart. I tried to help Bill pick up the pieces and provide a home instead of a house for the boys.
It was very difficult in the beginning because I think the wounds had not really healed. I had to hear all the drama and was even dragged into it at times. We finally made our relationship official and I thought things would then calm down only to find out that things had gotten really bad for Roy. We ended up in a custody battle only six months into marriage. The judge ordered for my husband and his EX to go to counseling. HOLY MOSES!!!! I thought I had completely lost my mind. It was awful to hear everything that went on. It created a huge wedge between Bill and I.
But somehow we kept going and closing doors as best we could. I had to do a lot of convincing for my husband to take his emotions out and just move on. We have tried to get better at controlling our home. Ultimately, that is all you can control and all the rest will just cause issues. If you spend more time being pissed off at the ex then you miss out on the happiness with your kids.
I kept talking about this "step mom" thing with my sister today. She kept saying,"Man, you keep going on and on about it!" But I think it was liberating for me to hear other women in my shoes and it really felt like a ton of bricks was lifted off my shoulders. It felt like my voice was heard. I am not a complainer so I always try to brush things under the rug but I definitely needed this refresher.
We just have to keep doing the right thing and influence these children as best we can. It is a roller coaster ride and seems like there are so many more things we have against us but God sure has a way of sending us down the path we are suppose to be on. I always hope that He will pat me on the back someday and say Well done!!

Being a Step Mom Changed My Life

I follow a blog and they have a neat link up today for step moms and I just felt moved to connect with other step moms because the task can be extremely difficult but yet rewarding in so many ways I never thought were possible. Check it out at www.kellyskornerblog.com. She has an amazing website. I cannot wait to read other step moms stories. (because one thing I am sure of WE got some stories to tell :))

I met my husband in a sort of random way. My sister got married in 2000 and I was very close to her and her husband. I would often go with her to her husband’s family functions. I became a part of the family rather quickly. He had a brother that wasn’t around much but when he came we always seemed to have a good time. He was dating someone else at the time and they had two children together. Fast forward a few years and he ended up getting married and divorced rather quickly. Then…… in 2006 we were at Christmas Eve festivities when we decided to go to the movies. We ended up going to a New Year’s Eve party together and having a blast. We began dating and at the time Roy was 6 and Gavin was 10 months old. They knew me as Aunt Summer so it was an easy transition for the boys. I have grown to love my step sons. I have noticed that being a step mom allowed me to not take things for granted. When children are not biologically yours, you tend to cherish the hugs and attention that comes your way because it doesn’t always happen. Here are my special little boys when I first entered their lives.

The older boy, Roy, has had it rough. He had a hard time adjusting but we soon found that we both loved basketball. I poured my heart into playing with him in the backyard and running out to the card shop whenever we could. The reciprocation of love isn't always there but somewhere inside him I know he loves me but I just don’t always feel the “love” from him. I take this very personal and often can get my feelings hurt. Then there are times he completely surprises me and hugs me and sits on my lap (yes, even now that he is 11). He go through ups and downs but I love him and am so thankful that he is in my life.

Gavin was so small when I came around that he doesn’t know any different. He only knows his dad and I as a couple. Because of his age we definitely have a much closer bond. He calls me mom and doesn’t skip a beat in our home. Before he started kindergarten, I would often keep him home from daycare just so we could spend time together. He loves to play outside and is always asking me to play with him. He is getting older now and I am always scared he will slowly stop calling me mom but until then I will eat this stage up. He is such a sweet natured boy. He is always willing to help me with whatever I am doing. He is always ready to love and he always loves with no reservations. I think he feels safe with me.

These two boys mean absolutely everything to me. They helped me grow up and learn to be a mom. They have taught me unconditional love even when it is sometimes difficult. I am so honored to be their step mom. It makes me feel so special when I think of the boys when I first came around in 2007 and can see my hand in helping then become who they are today. I feel like I have helped create a home for them. I feel like I have shown them love and what a wonderful loving two parent home is all about. I know that they don’t always appreciate me and don’t realize all I do for them but I hope one day they will look back and see that I did everything I could for them and always will.

Finally, we added a new addition in June of 2011. It has been amazing to see the boys become big brothers. They make my heart melt when they cuddle up with him. Kiernan lights up when he sees his brothers. Adding a child of my own has definitely changed things but I always hope that the boys feel they are all loved equally and that their dad and I will do anything for them. I am committed to this little blended family and making us grow to an amazing little unit.

Port A- Little Shell

Despite the weather predictions, we thought we would live dangerously and head out to Port A with Candace and George. KK had an awful night. We was up all night long. I think the poor thing was freezing. So everyone was on NO sleep but we decided to head out to the beach to catch some fish. KK set up camp. Daddy decided to stick him in his waders and let him fish. Kiernan thought this was fun for about 2 seconds and then he was done.

Super cute!!

He is obsessed with touching my face. He is so sweet.

The beach is a long bumpy ride so KK was extra fussy (can't say I blame him) The ride makes me pretty cranky. So KK became the pilot for awhile.

He wasn't very interested in the road. He found George was more interesting to look at.

Candace sat with him at the bonfire.

We ate sausages, roasted marsh mellows and chowed down on some chips. The perfect bonfire food.

Candace went out over the dunes and got some great shots of the sun going down. It was really cold but very peaceful out there. We caught no fish but had a fun time.

Roy's Playoff Game

I have been on Roy forever to just relax and play normal. He is like every 11 year old and watches the NBA and thinks fade aways and falling sideways when you shoot is cool. Unfortunately, it makes him not so good because he can't do all of that stuff. I have been on him for like 3 years to quit this and just play normal. I have been teaching him to be set when he shoots. My dad and I are obsessed with the stop and pop in the lane and I have been begging for Roy to try that move. I have harped on him about the silly reverse layup that he loves and try to tell him if you just shot a normal layup you would probably make it. On Sunday Bill and I played bball in the driveway and put KK in his bouncer for hours. We didn't go easy on him and really had a lot of fun. Tonight was Roy's first playoff game in this league that I am not so fond of but none the less attend and cheer for him. He started the first play of the game spotting up at the three point line. Got a great passed, squared up and shot a perfect three point shot... SWISWH!! It was text book. Completely in control. I screamed!!
Next play down he got the ball, shot faked a three and jumped stop completely in control and drained a shot from the corner of the key. ROY????? Is this you!!!!

I was going crazy in the stands. Seriously, I am not some crazy step mom when I say this, "This was the BEST game I have ever seen him play!! EVER!!!" He stayed in control the whole game. He jumped in passing lanes and stole the ball numerous times. He also led the fast break and shot normal layups and made them. He led the fast break and made the unselfish decision to pass when he was contested and his teammates scored the bucket. HE DID EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER TOLD HIM.

Now I am sure he didn't get all his skills from me but since I have been in the picture Roy and I have bonded over ball. He knows what a huge part of my life ball has been. He knows I played in college and know a thing or two about the game. I think somewhere deep in his soul he thinks I do know what I am talking about.

After the game, I boasted on Roy as much as I could. I told him how wonderful he played and reminded him that he should always play this in control and I think he will start to see a huge difference in his game. I also somewhere deep in my soul feel all my hard work and efforts with him finally paid off. Sure does make me feel good.

Move over David

Sooooo..... Ashley has reluctantly finally given up some of Rocco's cute clothes so that KK can enjoy looking handsome every once in awhile. I have been through the tub and found some super cute items. He is wearing 9-12 month clothes now so I knocked out some of the old and brought in some new items to get some use. Ashley says all of these clothes were worn by Rocco at two months. Yes, KK is a little thang and it getting use out of all these clothes that Ash had to quickly put away for her chunky monkey. I found this soccer jersey that I think gives D@ vid Beckum a run for his money. And of course this jersey would have never worked if Ash and I hadn't planned it so perfectly to marry brothers so the last name is even correct. Can't get any better than that!!

Bill got creative and said, " Summer, he needs a K to play with!!" Good idea!!

8 Months

I know I am horrible that it is 5 days later and I am just now getting to celebrate KK is 8 months old. I was very frustrated on his actual birthday because of course I couldn't get him to give me the perfect smile and picture for his 8 months. UGH!! Now I know it is not that serious but for me I take it so personal. For whatever reason he goes stone cold when I bring out the big camera. I know it is that huge flash but the pictures come out so nice when I get to use it. He also will only smile if Gavin is behind me making faces at him. Kiernan LOVES his brother Gavin and I mean LOVES him. When it is just me KK is okay but if Gavin is home he is always smiling at him. I took a few sweet shots outside. He really liked the grass and the leaves.

This is the only smile I could get that day when I was by myself.

And here are the smiles with Gavin behind me.

Cutie Pie!!

Kiernan is rocking on all fours and just around the corner from crawling. The daycare says they think he is going to skip crawling and head straight to walking. He loves to hold on to hands and walk everywhere. He can be totally crying sitting there and I pull him up on his feet and he instantly stops crying and starts looking at his feet to see what he is doing.

He loves green beans, squash and sweet potatoes. I am going to finish up my 1 Gerber foods and step him up to the 2's. I also introduced him to yogurt yesterday. He seems to like it. He wants anything the boys have in their hands. He will play on the floor but recently would rather be in the bouncer so he can be up on his feet. Yesterday he played in it for hours as Dad, Roy and I played basketball all afternoon. He is still not a great napper and needs it to be super quiet to even go to sleep. I think he has bounced back from the flu but is still fussy and coughing so I hope he isn't still battling ears of throat problems that I am overlooking. He is getting a little more hair but still rather bald. Supposedly he waves bye bye but I have yet to see him do it. He is also Mr. Bitter!! He has top and bottom front teeth in and his top incisors are almost all the way through. Don't put your finger anywhere close to him month or he might bite it off and be careful playing with him because he will drop his head and bite ya in a second. Happy 8 month son!!

The Flu

Friday afternoon, I noticed that Kiernan was being extra fussy. When we went out to dinner he normally sits in the chair and laughs and plays. He was not having any of the dinner. He wouldn't even laugh for his cousins. As I was doing my normal bedtime routine KK threw up all over us. Hmmmm.... I decided to put us in the bath and do the whole routine over again. As I was putting him in his crib.... throw up again. UGH!!! Finally I gave up and just changed him and let him be. He was very whinny and wanted to be held. Something was not right. This began an extremely long night of him on my chest. In the morning I got him a doctor's appointment. KK had the flu!! She said I needed to watch him very carefully because babies die from the flu..... HELLLLOOOO...Way to freak me out. I got home and began trying to nurse him back to health. Bill and I stayed home ALL weekend and cared for him. So exhausting. He had another bad night on Saturday on my chest. I already have a bad back but two nights sitting up with a baby sent me body into trauma. By Sunday night we decided to try formula and food again. He kept it down and only woke up at 2:00am on Sunday night. I am thinking he is on his way back to being healthy again. He was face planted on me all weekend.

Poor guy. Excuse my picture we literally stayed in our PJs all weekend long!

Bill's 40th Birthday

Last Saturday night, we had all our friends over to celebrate Bill's 40th birthday. Mom made this yummy cake and I had to add the text. We had tons of food but at the end of the night the food was GONE. All of it. People were coming back for seconds and thirds.

Bill had a blast out by the barbecue pit talking with the guys. I think they even did some tequila shots. We had a great turn out and Bill said he had lots of fun.

Look at everyone that showed up.

The birthday boy.

Rocco getting a close look at which drink he wants.

We had the fire pit going and one of the neighbors went up to the gas station and got all the kids marsh mellows. That kept them occupied all night.

Vegas Baby!!

I had to start this post with the way my son has decided he likes to fall asleep. The funny part is he is in the complete dark but feels the need to cover his eyes as if to say, "Mom, it is so bright!!" I really regretted leaving him but I felt I had to take Bill on a special 40th bday trip. I mean I have to admit it is not every day you turn 40!!!!! I knew the boys were in good hands and I did my best to leave it behind and enjoy our adult time. We stayed at H@ rr @hs and had a great time. We started out a little strong the first day but chilled out the rest of the trip. We made a huge loop around almost every hotel the last day with his friends. We had a blast. Bill drank wayyyyy tooooo much and ended up in this outfit.

I enjoyed Bell @gio's lobby with the shout out to the Chinese new year. I did not take a camera but felt I needed at least one picture from our trip for proof.

Bill had his best luck the very last night and I was ready to come home. Bill stayed out really late and ended up on top that night. He was hurting the whole flight home and the next day and the next but I think he had a blast. Happy 40th honey!!

Sunday Funday... Wellllll

I got the boys up for church this morning and we headed out the door. We looked so cute that I had to snap a quick picture. We then headed to @cademy to get Bill some shoes (from the boys) for his birthday. We then looked at guns and ended up buying our first .22 ever. We are going to give it to the boys since we are working on my mom's land so that we can go down there to shoot and play. Just kind of a get-a-way for our family. Anyway. I am so nervous around guns but I like this one and I think the boys are really going to like going down to the land. We then headed to lunch with mom and dad. I stopped on the way home at Carters for a quick exchange and then we headed home. Bill started on the outside and I started on the inside. WOW!! The house and yard looks great. We are all ready for the big bday party. I almost thought the party was today since the place is looking so good. Now we just have to maintain until Saturday. I also was able to go for another walk/run down at the park. Two days in a row and I am feeling so good.

Going to be a short week..... Getting ready for Bill's birthday and then Vegas!!

Saturday Night Bonfire

Saturday night I set out on a little walk/run down at our neighborhood park. I walked down to the park and then when I got there I walked one minute and ran one minute until I got to 30 minutes and then I walked back. It felt really good. I just feel like my tummy is getting a little flabby since I stopped breast feeding. I am not the best eater so I have no choice but to exercise. But tonight it felt great. No pain in my body.

When I got home, this is what I found on my back porch. My honey had started a little fire and he and KK were hanging out. Super Cute!!

Me and my boy!!

He didn't last very long because he was ready for bed. I went and put him in bed and Bill and I sat and drank a beer and hung out. It was kind of nice to relax. We got a little cold out there. We are such wimps. Now we are inside looking for something on TV. Lately we have been unable to find anything good.

7 Months Old

Another month gone by.... I swear I think time is flying these days. I really liked all of the changes. Kiernan sits and plays by himself for long stretches. He is sitting up very well. He no longer will sit in the bouncer while I shower. He turns over and tries to crawl out the back. He likes squash, green beans and sweet potatoes. Not so much on carrots and peas. He likes bananas, pears, apples, peaches and prunes. He also loves cereal.

He has two bottom teeth and has the top left tooth with the right one peaking through. KK seems to be getting less fussy. He lights up when I come to get him for daycare. He loves to watch the dogs turn circles around him and he loves his brothers. His personality is showing and is recognizing different items. He is reaching for his bottle. He goes to bed between 6:30 and 7:00, sleeps til 5:00am (when I give him 6oz) and then continues to sleep til around 7:00am. He soaks his bed every morning when I got to get him. Guess his bladder is big!!

He got to share his 7 month birthday with one of his favorite cousins, Rocco!! Rocco was performing so well for the cameras while KK was over the photo shoot.

Happy 3rd birthday Roc and Happy 7 months to KK!!

Nurse's Elbow

Google it! I did. Yesterday I got the dreaded phone call that would make any parent's heart stop. Kiernan daycare calls and says that Kiernan's right arm is not responding and he cries if you try to move it. WHAT!!!???!!! My whole body went numb. I felt heat just release throughout my body. Never really felt anything like it before. I was about 5 minutes away and I think I made it there in 2.5 minutes. I walked in and he didn't respond to me like normal. He just seemed a little blah. I sat him on the floor and did my own mommy testing and sure enough his right arm would respond. I took his shirt off and he really cried when I got his arm out. No bruising and it really didn't look different from his left arm except that is was just sort of hanging there. I immediately called the doctor and I asked the guy about KK's arm and if I should bring him there or take him to the ER. His response was I can't help you I can only schedule you an appointment. UGH!!! Man buddy you got your job down. I was so annoyed. He scheduled me in at 4:00.... it was only 1:00pm. So I explained that let's put him down for a nap and then I will get him and take him in. Well as I was explaining this the guy calls back and somehow found me an appointment RIGHT NOW. Well thank you sir.

So I loaded him up and set out to the doctors. It took what I felt was an eternity but finally they called me back. We got his weight and headed to a room. We sat there forever. As we were sitting there KK started to use his right hand a little to reach for things. Finally the doctor came in and she checked his arm. She pressed around and sure enough when she hit his elbow he screamed. She said yep Nurse's Elbow. What is that? She said all four of my kids had it. What? I have never heard of this. She said his radius had come out of place. Basically it's like your shoulder popping out of socket. She asked if she could try to put it back in place and I said yeah please help me. She pressed on his arm and kind of turn it like you would raise your hand and POP right back in place. Immediately he reached with the hand. AMAZING. No pain!! She said he wouldn't even be sore. She told me one of her kids has it happen a lot and it is a pain. Another one of her kids it happened once and never again. That is what I am hoping for.

Isn't God crazy... out of all of the doctors that day I got her. A mom whose all four kids have had this happen to them. I am so thankful. He slept for an hour after we left and I drove around to make sure he got a good nap in. I haven't seen any changes in him since. He is all back to normal.

Loving this Stage

First of all, it was my wonderful niece, Jillian's, birthday on Friday so I spoiled her and took her to Chucky Cheeeese on Saturday and then the kids all wanted to spend the night. I had a horrible stomach bug but I couldn't break the little 5 year olds heart. So I let them tear the house apart. (this is super hard for me because I am crazy OCD with the home) But here they are with all their blankets watching a little VeggieTales. All went well and Ash even took all 5 kids (minus Roy) to church on Sunday morning so I could recover from my sickness. What a Saint!! I had to show a few pictures of my little man playing with Gavin. I swear I can already see a special little bond forming between the two. Kiernan is always looking for him and Gavin is always asking where he is and when can we pick him up from his school.

Gavin found some fun glasses and began playing with KK. He was cracking up laughing.

He finally sat still enough and Gavin was able to get him to model the glasses.

Kiernan is at a great stage for me right now. He is able to sit up and I have made a little area for him with all of his toys and he plays and plays. He picks up toys and inspects them, puts them in his mouth and then sets them back down and moves on to the next toy.

Look at that tooth!!

Melts My Heart

Gavin has been into paper and markers lately. He asks for BLANK white paper from my desk. He has since found these glitter markers Bill brought. (GRRR!!!) But when he comes screaming in the room to show me his finish products and hands me his masterpieces, I can't help but have a huge smile on my face. He is such a love bug. He had shifted and was calling me Summer quite often but now he has switched back to mom. When he is being silly he calls me M-O-M and spells it out since he is learning how to spell and read. So I have been calling him G-A-V-I-N. He makes me laugh.